One of the biggest fallacies that I have come across in the gay community is this idea of “compromising” and “equality” in relationships. The premise that: success in any relationship is dependent on the will to mutually compromise every time. This concept alone is the reason why the gay community has an extremely high relationship failure rate. We fail to realize that the world, as well as the universe that it was born from, is made possible through polarity. Everything in life has binary components; 1’s and 0’s; on and off; light and dark; summer and winter. No matter what situation, there is always a masculine and feminine principle that makes everything work.
A very good example of this is the brain. The left brain controls our verbal, analytical and rational abilities. It gives the ability to be linear and pay attention to detail. On the other hand, the right brain controls our sensory, emotional, imaginative and creative abilities. A good way to put this all into perspective is to think of the concept of affirmations. Affirmations are the practice of using words repetitively to achieve a desired result. What makes affirmations work is its repetitiveness. When you are using affirmations: the conscious mind, or left brain, is literally impressing (or fucking… or spanking) its linear verbal/intention/will/phallus on the subconscious, or right brain, until that desire has been received, obeyed and manifested. Another example; a man will impregnate a woman with his seed. She nurtures and cultivates his blueprint. Another example; the moon is void, ineffective and not seen until it is filled with the Sun’s light. Once the moon is filled with the Sun’s light, it has very obvious affects on our Earth.
Though we gay men are different from the mass of heterosexuals, that doesn’t give us the excuse to reinvent the wheel. In every relationship, vanilla or not, there must be a Dominant and submissive partner for it to be truly successful. It is very important to recognize your position in this transaction and perform to it faithfully. No gay relationship can work with two dicks (1 and 1) or two asses (0 and 0). It can only work with a dick (1) and ass (0). One who gives his will/direction/dick and one who takes his will/direction/dick. How can a relationship strive for longevity, commitment and intimacy when there are two goals? When there is a disagreement, who is going to concede?
There can only be one Leader/Dominant to an infinite number of followers. When you are “equals”, you are at a constant state of war; battling for supremacy. The relationship will be so focused on balancing the scale that there will be neither time nor energy to have focused on the premise, goals and ideologies of the relationship; look at the democrats and the republicans.